Jess Commons | Deputy Editor | Thursday, 26 March 2015

Poop emoji loo chat

Reclaim Our Toilet Breaks! Here's What To Do While You're Sat On The Loo

The Debrief: Why should boys have all the fun?

You know how like at around 11 o’clock in the morning your male housemates/colleagues will roll up the Sun/Guardian, grab their phone and head off to the loo for an unspecified amount of time? Looks fun, huh? Us girls, though, are stupidly so terrified of being found out that we poo that we’ll dart in to the loos and run back out again as quickly as nature will possibly allow us.

In all our haste though, aren’t we missing out on the nice long sessions of ‘me time’ that men get to have to themselves? You know, where they can walk away from all life’s problems, lock themselves in solitary confinement and spend a few minutes of pure uninterrupted quality time with little old them. Ladies, it’s time to jump on that bandwagon.

Here’s some fun things to do to pass time on the loo.

If you don’t have internet
If your office is like ours then all the Wi-Fi signals don’t stretch into the bathrooms, which is disappointing for when you fancy surfing The Debrief. If this is the case, you need an offline hobby and may we suggest the humble art of reading. Not like, with a book (too obvious) but on the Kindle app on your phone. Check out Jill Alexander Essbaum’s just released novel Hausfrau. It’s the *actual* new Gone Girl.

If you fancy a challenge
High octane loo break coming up. Download Triva Crack, the game everyone’s banging on about that’s just got more addictive with its latest update. It bascially enables you to get competitive as you take on your friends and randoms in general knowledge quiz rounds. It’s like Trivial Pursuit but you don’t have to wait for Aunty Mae to read out the questions.

If work is hell
Ditch the internet surfing lady, that thing’s only going to make you feel more stressed out and this is one hundred percent meant to be a relaxing time. Use your loo break to get mindful with these free guided mediations from UCLA. There’s some three minute ones for the short haulers, but some go on as long as 19 minutes if you’re in for a lengthy sitting.

If you’ve got time on your hands
Whether you’re literally unable to leave the loo (get that girl some Imodium) or you’re lucky enough to have a job that won’t notice if you disappear for more than 10 minutes, you need something you can actually accomplish to make you feel like your loo break was justified. Download Brief Me, the app that’ll deliver you the top ten most read articles across the web so you can walk back into the office and pick up the conversation right where you left off.

If it’s first thing in the morning
Give yourself an extra 10 minutes in bed by saving your make-up until you’re on the loo. Check out the lazy girl’s guide to doing a simple and classic make up look here in three minutes flat. Watch, learn, repeat.

Liked this? You might also be interested in: 

How To Poo When You’re On Holiday With A Boy And You Haven’t Got To That Place Yet 

Women In Their Early 20s Are More Likely To Suffer From IBS Than Any Other Group. So Why Is Toilet Chat Still Taboo?

How The Hell Do You Poo? And Other Social Minefields To Navigatge At The Start Of A Relationship

Follow Jess on Twitter @Jess_Commons

Tags: Tech