I Tested The Powder That Promises To Make You More Beautiful
The Debrief: Truth be told, I saw a real difference, but it wasn’t the one the packaging promised.
Although it’s something I try my best to deny, deny, DENY, I would love to be a bit more beautiful.
I know it’s boring and attention-seeking and yes, being a good person who smiles a lot is beautiful, but I also want skin that glows like a Jo Malone candle and hair as long as my post-holiday to-do list. I am convinced if I looked like Emily Ratajkowski people would listen to my ideas more, boys wouldn’t ghost me on Tinder and I wouldn’t leave Topshop changing rooms feeling a resounding sense of despair.
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It was like the universe listened to my ‘ImSoUglyIWillDieAloneEatenByMothsAndSadness’ and produced a supplement that promises to make you look more beautiful. Equil London Beautiful powder is a multivitamin supplement that’s designed to be mixed with water each morning. It promises to leave your skin ‘clear and glowing’, balances hormones, digestion, immunity, adrenal function and inflammation. It helps with skin conditions such as eczema, acne and even helps combats ageing. Supposedly.
WHERE DO I SIGN UP?!
As ever, my first reaction was unchecked optimism. My mind spiralled as I thought, ‘what if it really did work and I became so beautiful that I’d make city boys faint on the tube with my dazzling self? ‘What if I could no longer venture outside due to a flurry of marriage proposals and people begging to take my picture? Am I ready for this dramatic life-upheaval?!’ Sure, I may look like a thumb, but at least I can go buy some milk without being catcalled.
I looked again at my moon face in the mirror and decided public declarations of love were something I could get used to. SO. In the name of journalism/vanity, I tried this fancy-shmancy Beautiful Powder for 30 days and here are the results.
What Did It Taste Like?
It isn’t something you’d want on tap TBH. It tastes pretty bad, but after a while, you kinda get used to it. HEY, NO PAIN NO GAIN.
Did It Make Me Look More Beautiful?
Erm no. No, it did not. I did a whip around the office and asked if they thought I looked any different and they said no. Maybe they just really fancy me and were to scared to say.
How Many Boys Asked Me On A Date?
One, actually! Though, on the actual date, he spent the entire time talking to some people he just met in a pub garden about Brexit, so I couldn’t have been that hot.
Is My Skin Clearer?
I saw a really big difference with my skin. I normally get quite a few spots around the chin area, and my face is naturally quite red and sensitive. Now, my skin is a lot more clearer and I even occasionally flirt with no foundation days! The redness on my cheeks has calmed down quite a bit, and I look a lot more glowy. (Though I’m not sure I’m ready to forgo the highlight just yet…)
Hormones? Am I chilled AF?
This is where I noticed the biggest change. Since taking this powder I am more directed, and I have energy pulsating through every vein! I only got a little bit down when I broke my foot and even then, I was over it in approx 1.3 seconds! As my energy levels soar and I smash through my to-do lists, I feel less stressed than I would usually am. I feel so Goddamn happy, I almost worry I'm a smug bastard (but, then I’d be worrying, which is not something I do anymore, is it!) GOOD VIBES ONLY, BABY.
All in all, it’s definitely made me a 2.0 version of myself - but, just to manage your expectations, it can’t actually get rid of a double chin.
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