All The Worst Make-Up Trends From Your Youth
The Debrief: From the blue eyeshadow to Nivea Pearl lip balm, your face has been a disaster from age 13 onwards.
Just how bad were the beauty fads you followed growing up? Oh, they were bad.
Because this was your first exploration into beauty, we'll let you off. The blue eyeshadow in question probably came from your mum's make-up drawer, was left over from her time bopping around the area's local nightclubs to Duran Duran in the 80s and was from a company with a name like 'Miss Cleo' which was scrawled across the lid in that 80s italic font that everyone was obsessed with.
Liberal and heavy application to your eyelid was the best way to go with this and, even though the resulting look was more 'victim of a blueberry factory explosion' than 'sleek shimmery mermaid', you rocked it with a all the pizazz and confidence of a teeny bopper who's biggest care in the world was whether Lee Ryan was going to keep it together long enough to make another album with the gang.
Mascara was fine when they created it. A subtle black or brown coating to help accentuate your eyes and make them 'pop'. For some reason though, the late 90's early 00s decided that no, the humble mascara could be improved upon. Both by adding colour, and making it for your hair. The result? Green and purple and even red mascara made everyone's eyes look possessed and hair mascara turned your already questionably coloured from the Sun-In hair into a spermy, sticky mess.
Nivea Pearl Shine Lip Stuff
One of the beauty industry's more afforable trends; this must-have lip balm is actually still on sale today kids. Launched in 2001, the frosted pink lip colour conditioned your lips and also had the added bonus of making it look like you'd gone hell-for-leather in your make out session with a unicorn.
The two face-framing hair strands
Some people used hair gel to get these tendril bits perfect, others used lick n' spit. These were essentially the female version of men with rat tails; one of the worst caucasian hair trends to ever circulate. Often teamed with a tight bun in a scrunchy, or a high ponytail. Thanks Mel C for this one.
Again, if it ain't broke, don't fix it. Bronzer and blusher was doing just fine until some bright spark in the beauty industry decided to turn the packaging from a flat compact into a little tube of spheres made out of the powder. Not only did this prevent you from getting the portion controls right (BIG brown streak down one cheek), it also meant that, at some point, you'd drop said tub on the floor and create bronze-apocalypse in the hallway of your high school. Janitors loved you.
Tippex as nail paint
It wasn't like you couldn't afford nail varnish. This was back in the days when you could walk into Superdrug, pick up a bottle of MIss Sporty Tangerine Fatal nail varnish, hand over a quid and still leave with change. The bottle of Tippex from the stationary cupboard though, with it's chemically smell which you know could send you funny if you sniffed just hard enough, was far more alluring and came with just the right amount of 'edge' to set you apart from the other girls in your class. Until they started doing it too.
Now, it's all about fat caterpillar Charlie Simpson style eyebrows but, back in the day, if your eyebrows weren't skinnier than Nicole Richie, you were doing something wrong with the tweezers. As it were you looked either permanently surprised or, if you weren't blessed with much above-eye fuzz, like you'd had a run in with your Dad's electric razor.
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