Charlie Gowans-Eglinton | Fashion Editor | Tuesday, 3 May 2016

The Debrief Debates: Shorts. Are They The Work Of The Devil Or God\'s Gift To Legs?

The Debrief Debates: Shorts. Are They The Work Of The Devil Or God's Gift To Legs?

The Debrief: Why can’t we all just get along?

Here at The Debrief, we pride ourselves on tackling the big, hot-button issues. This week? Shorts. For and against ‘em. 

For: Rebecca Holman, Editor

Who doesn’t bloody love a good pair of shorts? Not me - which is a double negative because shorts. Are. The. Best. They’ve basically got all the versatility of trousers but with the added advantage of being far less boring. And despite CGE’s protestations to the contrary, they’re really bloody flattering. Let me show you the ways:  A patterned pair of shorts are far more forgiving on one’s (my) bottom than a similarly gaudy pair of trousers. A pair of shorts cut just at the perfect point above your mid thigh can be an insanely leg-lengthening thing. A smart pair of shorts look cool with white plimsolls, are totally acceptable for work and are the perfect way to stand out from a sea of nice dresses and heels on a night out. I’m not a total lunatic, I’m not going to try and convince you that all shorts look amazing on all people (even I, the ultimate shorts evangelist have had some shockers over the years) - the key is picking the right cut and shape. But that’s the beauty of shorts, they come in any length you want, they’re basically Choose Your Own Adventure trousers. Not for today though. You’ll only get blue knees. 

Against: Charlie Gowans-Eglinton, Fashion Editor

I’m not short (ooo err, punny) of clothes in my wardrobe. Countless navy jumpers, endless pairs of jeans. 20+ jackets. Ok, 30+. At one point I had to have a word with myself about my 11 pairs of black ankle boots. But I don’t own a single pair of shorts, and I’m standing by it. They’re the worst. I like trousers, and in theory, these are just short trousers, but then you put them on and OH DEAR GOD WHAT HAPPENED TO MY LEGS THEY LOOK LIKE THEY’VE EATEN SOMEBODY ELSE’S LEGS. I’ve never looked worse than I do in shorts. It’s not the length – I don’t love my potato smiley knees, but I wear skirts and dresses that length and feel fine-ish. But shorts make me look like a retired lady called Margery taking a coach tour with my best friend Pam. I’ve tried longish ones and micro ones and literally all of the shorts, and they were all earth-shatteringly bad. People with better legs than me can get away with shorts, but I’m really not sure why they’d want to – I just don’t think they’re that nice. Apart from the high-waisted, slightly a-line, tailored kind, which I think are beyond chic with a little blouse tucked in, but are also woefully elusive – the last unicorn of shorts. I think I’ve found them, but then I look directly at them - and *pfft*, there’s Margery, staring back at me.  

Here are some shorts to buy, if you like shorts. Traitors.

1. Checked, £25,99,

2. Mango

3. Denim turn-ups, £35

4. Dr Denim at Asos; Red, £25.99

5. Zara; Khaki, £34, Topshop

6. Denim with pockets, £29.95 Gap

7. Striped, £25, Asos Curve

8. Polka dot, £95, Topshop Unique

9. Pinepple Embroidered, £25.99, Zara

10. Navy belted, £35, Finery

Like this? Then you might also be interested in:

How To Make 6 Really Nice Wedding Guest Outfits Out Of 9 Things From Asos, Zara and H&M For The Bazillion Weddings You're Going To This Summer

Fashion Deconstructed: On Biller Piper Circa Because We Want To

15 Pairs Of Sunglasses To Buy And Wear When It's Sunny And Also When You're Pretending To Be Famous Or Have Pink Eye

Follow Charlie on Instagram @charliegowans

Tags: Fashion Questions