Here's A Few Ways Your Wardrobe Changes With Your Relationship Status
The Debrief: Er, do my shoes scream single?
Do relationships change people, or do people change for a relationship? I’m at an age where everyone around me is either settling down into long term commitments of the ‘let’s buy property and get engaged’ type, or stone cold single where it’s still appropriate to throw up at 3am, wake up the next morning fully clothed and claim Sainsbury’s fizzy laces as a ‘proper meal’. You can guess which camp I fall in.
Now, I’m extremely happy for my coupled up friends, they’ve picked well and fortunately thanks to being surrounded by other fellow singletons I’ve been prevented from despairing I’m going to die a lonely old cat lady. I’ve even gone through the whole year where the only Bridget Jones type moments came during a trip to Ikea - no one should go through that alone – and my Nan tutting that I was 27 and single. Cheers Nan.
However there are a lot of differences between the loved up and the lone wolves, from social media feeds to how Friday nights are spent to what to watch at the cinema. But if I’m being perfectly honest I’m not really bothered about all that. I’m far more interested in how our wardrobes change depending on relationship status. It’s subtle of course, no one’s suddenly dressing in flared skirts and pearls - what better outfit to scream ‘I’m in a relationship!’ - more a few gradual alterations that are glaringly obvious when you think about it. And I’ve thought about it a lot.
1. A Whole New FREE Wardrobe
This is obviously the best thing about being in a couple and a major advantage over us Tinderers. Once you make relationship status you have access to a brand new capsule closet. Boyfriend jeans from an actual boyfriend! It spawned an entire denim movement. Plus shirts, oversized jumpers and tracksuit bottoms – there really is nothing quite like a boy’s Nike tracky-b’s. Of course it’s very much a one-way system, but unfortunately for men a chiffon pussybow blouse just doesn’t work the same way. Unless he's a big fan of Gucci's Feminiello, then sure.
2. All the Time in the World
I’m going to be honest; I take ages to get ready. On a Saturday night it can be anywhere between 10 minutes and an hour just to get my foot in the shower. I dawdle, sit on the phone, pull every almost-identical black top from my wardrobe and throw them on my bed before finally going to my housemate’s room to borrow something from her. I love that no one’s telling me to hurry up and that I’m not limited in my length of shower. And it’s fantastic that I can spend twenty minutes trying to contour my face before realizing I have no idea what I’m doing. All this I’m pretty sure my relationship friends don’t get to enjoy. They’ve got the other half speeding things along.
3. No More 1D PJs
Sleeping is a big deal, easily a top 3 pastime and the source of many a conversation in my house about whose bed is the comfiest. (Answer: mine.) It’s also a big debate amongst my relationship-upped friends, bed-hogging being a major thing apparently. But the real concern that everyone seems to be ignoring is sleepwear. Cuddling up in cosy, fleecy, huge, printed pair of One Direction/Friends/Frozen pyjamas is one of the few benefits of long winter nights. Unfortunately, the problem is this isn’t something you wear with someone you fancy. So the loved up brigade banish Harry and Zayn to the back of the drawers. Hard luck boys.
4. Matchy Matchy
Dressing alike is not something couples would ever admit to doing but I swear it happens. (Maybe because of the whole wardrobe sharing – stealing – thing.) One of my very close friends once turned up on a date with her boyfriend in a carbon copy replica of his outfit, from the maroon cardigan to slightly worn white converse. And if it’s happened to them it must happen to everyone. Plus there’s the holiday wardrobe. Weekend in the Cotswolds, we’ll buy coordinating Barbour jackets. Off to Glasto, best get those matching Hunter wellies. It may not be scientific, but it is fact.
5. All My Single Ladies
On a single girls night out high heels are pretty much a given. They give you confidence, you’re suddenly 4 inches taller and they make your legs look fab. You might not even be on the pull but they definitely get you noticed. Is getting noticed on a date with your long-term man something you’re aiming for? Probably not. Sure you’ll pull them out for special occasions, but a few drinks in the local All Bar One isn’t something to get your best Kurt Geiger’s out for. Us single girls however would pull on a pair of heels for a trip to buy a pint of milk. No? Just me then.
6. It’s Fashion Darling
Some things boys just don’t get. Neoprene, peg leg trousers, metallic brogues and jumpsuits to name a few. Anything a bit out there that doesn’t necessarily look flattering but is still utterly fabulous doesn’t register on a lad’s scale. When you’re single you can wear these new-season-hottest-item purchases with no knowledge of how much the opposite sex don’t approve. Ahhhh, blissful single awareness. The flipside is that ladies in relationships have the opportunity ask their other half what they think of their brand spanking new purchase, which leads to a delightful conversation about why a jumpsuit is exactly the same as a Little Black Dress and just as appropriate to a family do. Cue doubtful expressions.
So there you have it, six fool proof (ish) differences about how we dress when single compared to in a relationship. Next time you see me I’ll probably be with my brand new boyfriend dressed in his jumper and putting together Ikea flat packed furniture - or, thinking about it - let's hope not!
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