Your Summer Sex Bucket List
The Debrief: Presenting your Summer Sex Bucket List
Chances are, as summer soars you’ll want to have sex. A lot. Sunlight and warm weather make you more horny, science says so: the production of libido boosting hormones is stimulated by exposure to sunshine. Basically summer is one massive excuse to get your sex on, so here are all the new sex things you should try before boring old winter comes around again:
Be more naked
Instate Naked Date Night. When it’s sunshiney wearing absolutely no clothes at all is appealing. Arrange an Adam and Eve themed night in with your partner: cook naked, eat naked, drink lots of red wine naked (and worry not of spilling it down yourself) and then do some sex things, still totally naked. If an evening of total nakedness feels daunting, try a preliminary No Knickers Night: think Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct. Extremely sexy.
Assume a new position
When you’re hot, pressing yourself against another hot body will intensify the distressing temperature situation. Make your summer sex mantra: only the genitals need touch. Discover a new position that doesn't require full body contact (i.e. banish missionary). If you feel about as supple as a an ancient oak tree when contemplating Kama Sutra-style sex positions, just improvise. Manoeuvre yourself into any position that requires minimal body contact: hold your partner at arms length or stand up and turn around, for example.
Only ever had sex with a roof over your head? It’s time to make a change. Find somewhere to literally roll in the hay, have a porny picnic (no food, just sex acts on a blanket), bed down on a mossy mound or brace yourself against a tree. You don't even have to venture far, suburban garden sex can be thrilling. Disclaimer: pick a secluded spot where you have a reasonable expectation of privacy - this could end quite badly if someone spots you, finds what you're doing alarming and tells the police.
Sex on the beach
Don’t actually have sex on the beach. Who wants to risk having their orifices invaded by sand or shag on a bed of stones? Make a Sex On The Beach cocktail instead and drink it on the shore with someone you’d like to have sex with later on, on less hostile terrain (basically any surface not comprised of tiny rock shards). Your shopping list: vodka, cranberry juice, peach schnapps and orange juice.
Introduce cold things
Have sex on a shade-chilled surface: the bathroom tiles, the kitchen counter, or on any of those flagstone floors ubiquitous in mediterranean holiday rentals. Alternatively, aim a load of fans at yourself for blow-out, wind-machine sex and incorporate ice, sexily, or hill your vibrator in the fridge - especially if it’s glass or metal.
Take it to the pool
Water makes things slippery and nice. Fact. However, do you have your own pool, or access to one that is clean and rarely frequented? Me neither. So pool sex, while appealing, is challenging to execute. The whole of the ocean is also out of bounds – for fear a sea creature might attempt to join in – which leaves a shallow bath. If shallow bath sex doesn't excite you just make sure you indulge in some sexy pool snogging – channelling Claire and Leo in Baz Luhrmann’s Romeo and Juliet.
Cheerlead the speedy shag
Picture this: you’ve gone on a summer holiday with your partner. You are both permanently slicked in a film of sweat and you float nowhere ethereally in sun dresses, you plod and all your clothes are stuck to you. This is probably because you booked a city break and have committed to a punishing itinerary of sightseeing. Let’s not pretend it’s a shag fest back at the hotel. Likelihood is you’re heat-drugged, curiously swollen-ankled and too exhausted to do anything energetic for longer than 10 minutes. Quickies are the very best option. Embrace the speedy shag with both sweaty arms and perfect your technique. Whoever said long sex is better sex lived in cool climes and hadn't spent the day appreciating hilltop panoramas.
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Artwork: Anna Jay
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