'Weed Tampons' Are A Thing And They Can Cure Period Pains
The Debrief: Any Volunteers?
At last. An actual solution to the monthly ‘shark tooth in your uterus’ sensation that every woman is forced to endure. Bloody mother nature. This particular treatment however, is a little more complicated than swallowing a pill and involves a little more - erm - legwork…?
A California-based company, Foria, has developed a new and innovative treatment for getting rid of those nasty menstrual cramps - Marijuana Vaginal Suppositories. Sold on Foria’s website in packs of two and four (costing $22 for only 2…cheeky), the tiny tampon-sized ‘suppositories’ consist of a ‘soothing’ mixture of, ‘Organic cocoa butter, 60mg of C02 Distilled THC Oil and 10mg of CD Isolate. Other wise known as cannabis (and cocoa butter).
The same company that graced us with such genius inventions as ‘Foria Pleasure’ - a lube containing ‘outdoor grown cannabis’ which promises to ‘Inspire healing and unlock pleasure’, has now turned their hand to soothing our monthly womb worries. Seems like they’re a pretty smart bunch. Or are they?
According to Foria’s website,
‘Foria Relief contains both THC and CBD, the two key active cannabinoid compounds found in cannabis. Together they activate certain cannabinoid receptors in the pelvic region when introduced into the body via these specially formulated suppositories’. Sounds promising, right?
They go on to refer to a customer’s experience to back up their pretty bold claims;
‘Users have reported a significant decrease in the pain and discomfort often associated with menstruation. The cannabinoids directly impact the immune system and the nerve endings of the uterus, cervix, ovaries and surrounding smooth muscle tissues’. Although, they would say that, wouldn’t they?
In an article for Broadly, writer, Mish Way expressed her utter joy and surprise at the welcome relief that a quick insertion (ew) of Floria brought mid-period.
‘I was surprised about the longevity. One Foria suppository did its job well into my evening’, she wrote. In fact, the more Mish Way thought about the concept of putting cannabis ‘down there’, the more it made her realise what a simple, yet obvious solution it was.
‘The more I thought about it’, she wrote, ‘the more unclenching your uterus with cannabinoids made perfect sense’. But before you start shoving oregano up you, take note of this very important detail:
THERE IS NO SCIENTIFIC EVIDENCE THAT THC OR CBD EASE MENSTRUAL CRAMPS.
Foria themselves acknowledge their rather alarming lack of actual scientific support for their ambitious promises.
‘ The information shared here is primarily based on patient's reported experiences and the limited scientific research currently available. Moreover, the statements made here regarding this product have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug’. Oh, greaaaaat.
They also mention (after they’ve tried to sell you their miracle cure, obviously) the following:
‘The efficacy of this product has not yet been confirmed by clinical or FDA-approved research and this product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease.’
‘There is no study on THC and/or CBD for menstrual cramps or pelvic pain or endometriosis. If fact the few studies on the reproductive tract are on rats. If that doesn’t reassure you I don’t know what will’, writes gynecologist, Dr Jen Gunter in her blog post that addresses the validity of Foria’s claims.
As for the company’s claims that ‘inserting’ Foria Relief won’t result in a psychological high, Dr Gunter pretty much calls bullshit.
‘This makes no sense’, she writes, ‘Medications are absorbed from the vagina into the bloodstream and then from the bloodstream they go to the uterus and the brain and everywhere else that blood goes’.
According to Foria, the technique works so well because uterus has ‘more cannabinoid receptors than any part of the body except the brain’. What does the doc reckon to that?
‘ I can find no study to support this assertion’. Ah, right…
Dr Gunter goes on to raise some quite serious concerns about the potential dangers of vaginal marijuana parcels, pointing out that, ‘one study has linked marijuana use with colonization of the vagina with yeast’. Oh god - not yeast. It gets worse
‘Technically there is more than enough THC in Foria Relief vaginal suppositories to get you very high and even send you to the emergency department, although as vaginal absorption of THC is totally unstudied who really knows?’
So basically, our dreams of a menstrual miracle are going up in a puff of smoke…
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