Alix Fox | Contributing Writer | Thursday, 14 April 2016

A Beginner\'s Guide To Cock Rings

A Beginner's Guide To Cock Rings

The Debrief: Cuz if you like it (to stay harder for longer) then you shoulda put a ring on it.

Condom kings Durex have just released a new product that looks like THIS:

Question: What the chuff it is?

Answer:

a/ A tiny pain relief cushion for Borrowers suffering from haemorrhoids

b/ A miniscule life preserver to save fairies who’ve got into distress while swimming

c/ The ghost of a dead doughnut

d/ A soft, stretchy cock ring, designed to help men sustain stronger, harder erections for longer by preventing blood from flowing out of the penis   

The correct response is of course ‘d’ (although you can have half a point if you answered ‘b’, because it is a type of boner buoyancy aid, intended to assist in keeping a chap’s chipolata afloat). This is the new Durex Pleasure Ring, which was launched after the brand surveyed 2,000 UK adults aged 18-55 and found that only 32% described themselves as having a ‘good sex life’. A common complaint causing folks to be less than bowled over by the standard of their own bonking was that sex simply wasn’t lasting very long: 25% of respondents reported that their average shag sessions went on for just 10-15 minutes, often because gents were struggling to make their donk-on last longer than this. In response, Durex decided to market a very straightforward, easy to use, no-bells-and-whistles* cock ring that’s being sold on the shelves of high street stores like Sainsbury’s, Boots and Superdrug, with the aim of 'simplifying and normalising the use of rings to help sustain erections', and showing people that such sex aids should be bought and used without embarrassment or shame, as an 'easy way to enhance intercourse and make it more enjoyable for both partners'. 

Well, bravo to all that. But how do you actually use a cock ring? Presumably you don’t stand at one end of the bedroom and chuck it at your fella’s todger like you’re playing hoopla, so how do you comfortably get it on him? Exactly where should it sit on his bits? And how long can he safely wear it for without his wanger turning puce and dropping off?

Here to enlighten us is sex toy expert Topher Taylor from gay erotic superstore Clonezone - he’s advised more blokes about choosing rings than than your local wedding jeweller. 

* If you DO want a cock ring with literal bells on to make your dingle jingle, then you can buy one here. Ding dong.  

Where do you put a cock ring?

Should you just thread it onto a gent’s schlong, like a bangle around his fandangle, or should it go round his ballsack as well? Once you know where it goes, how do you get it on there?

'Cock rings can be worn three ways,' advises Topher. 'The easiest method and what I’d recommend for newbies is just to pop one around the shaft of his penis, right at the base, nestling against where his pubic hair grows. This holds blood inside his erect cock and stops it flowing out again too quickly, helping him to stay hard. It also feels really great for guys who enjoy a sensation of pressure and squeezing around their dick.'

The Durex ring is intended to be worn like this. As it’s soft and gummy, it should be pretty simple to stretch out and pull down over his erection, but smooth a little water-based lubricant onto both the toy and his skin to help it slip on friction-free. This will make it comfier for him to wear during sex as well, so it doesn’t rub or chafe. 

The second approach is to choose a ring that’s large enough to wrap around his scrotum too. 'This is the most popular method with my customers; again, it helps men stay hard and is particularly useful for guys with erectile dysfunction issues,' says Topher. 'Plus, pressure round the base of the balls intensifies orgasm and helps a guy ‘fire’ powerfully when he cums.' Kapow!

There are various ways of getting his meat ‘n’ two veg inside a big ring. Jess Wilde of online sex superstore Lovehoney recommends beginning when he’s flaccid and gently plopping one testicle through, followed by the second, leaving the ring sitting round his party bag. Next, ‘fold’ the head of the penis through the ring (knob origami!) and feed through the length, so the toy is flush against his body with the entirety of his genitals hanging through it. There’s a really useful demonstration video here

Alternatively, you can buy cock rings that look like two hoops joined together: one for his scrote, the other for his peen. Others are made from strips of leather or neoprene that fasten with poppers or Velcro, so it’s not such a hassle to get them on and off. 

Finally, the third way to wear a cock ring is only around the balls, as a ‘stretcher’ to pull them downwards. 'Pulling the bollocks away from the body works as an ‘anchor’ for the base of the penile shaft, yet again enhancing erections and intensifying sensations and orgasm,' Topher tutors. 'If you’re a beginner who wants to experiment this way, do be careful to choose a light ring made from silicone or TPR (thermoplastic rubber). You can get really heavy ones made from steel that give extreme levels of weight and stretch, but they’re for experienced users only.'

Hang on – it seems you’re supposed to put some cock rings on when a man’s dick is floppy, and then he should get erect once he’s wearing them, while others go on after he’s already hard. What are the rules?

If you want to use a soft, squidgy, stretchy cock ring at the base of the penis, it’s best to pull it on when he’s already erect (or getting there). With less pliable and solid rings, it’s easiest to get everything in place while he’s soft; the ring will still allow the body to pump blood into the penis, so it firms up – then it helps to keep it there, slowing the rate at which it drains out and his hard-on deflates. 

Adjustable rings with fasteners can go on whenever suits you. Experiment!

How do you make sure you’ve got the right size ring? 

Stretchy and adjustable rings are good all-rounders that should comfortably fit most men. If you want to use a solid ring, select the right size by measuring round the base of his penis or his cock and balls (depending on how you want to wear the toy) when he’s flaccid. The right size ring shouldn’t fall off while he’s limp. Nor should it give him a limp because it’s squishing him more tightly than a coked-up banker’s handshake. 

We use condoms. Should the condom go on before or after the cock ring?

Opinions on this differ, and the type of ring plays a part, too. Durex say you should don a condom before putting their Pleasure Ring over the top of it. The ring will then help to keep the condom snugly in place during intercourse or play.

However, Topher recommends putting the ring on first. 'Personally, I wouldn’t want to potentially damage the material of the condom by dragging a ring over the top of it, or putting pressure on it,' he reasons. 

Obviously, if you’re using a ring that has to go on when the willy is wibbly wobbly, you won’t be able to slide on a condom until it’s erect. 

Follow the specific package instructions for the particular ring you choose to use, and pay extra attention to ensure condoms don’t get caught on the toy. 

How long can you keep a cock ring on for?

Durex state that the Pleasure Ring shouldn’t be worn for longer than half an hour, and that guys should take at least a 60-minute break between uses. But other types can be kept in place for up to 4 hours, according to Topher. 'If a ring ever feels uncomfortable or painful, remove it straight away, and never, ever fall asleep in it,' he warns. Wearing a ring for too long can cause bruising, rupturing of blood vessels, or even permanent dick damage. Eep!

Help – we have a cock ring cock-up! It’s stuck fast and we can’t get it off! 

First, try slapping on a load of lube to see if that helps ease the ring off your man’s dong. Applying ice wrapped in a tea towel can help shrink his junk and loosen things up. If you’re really in a fix, you can very carefully use rounded-edge safety scissors to cut off thin silicone or fabric rings. If all else fails, take your chap and his stricken D to A&E, but it’s highly unlikely you’ll find yourself in such a pickle. 

Any extra tips?

-'Vibrating stretchy cock rings are tonnes of fun,' says Topher. Try rotating them: when worn with the vibrating part sitting on the top of his cock, you’ll feel buzzing sensations against your clitoris every time he thrusts into you; when spun around so that the vibrating part rests against his sack, he’ll enjoy an extra tingle in his balls. 'I recommend alternating the vibration by switching the ring on and off during use or choosing a toy with more than one vibration pattern – this prevents you from getting too used to the feeling and ‘numbed’ by it,' Topher adds.


-'If guys want to experience "maximum dick enhancement", they should put their cock ring on after a hot bath or shower,' he continues. 'This is when his veins will be most prominent and look most impactful.'

-'Some men like to take their cock ring off just before they ejaculate,' Topher states. 'The sudden sense of release can feel mind-blowing. Others find that cock rings help them stay hard but make it difficult to actually cum, so they need something they can remove or loosen swiftly when they wish to climax.' In both cases, a cock tie or ‘lasso’ is a good option: a length of silicone folded into a loop and held together with an adjustable bead, so you can pull it as tight as you wish or release it quickly. Bonus: it looks like his wiener is wearing a teeny weeny cowboy-style shoelace necktie. Yeehaa!

-Dudes may want to shave or trim their pubes to avoid snagging ‘em on cock rings. 'Some men enjoy the pleasure/pain aspect of their pubic hair being tugged, but I definitely do not,' remarks Topher. 

-Do encourage your man to play with cock rings during masturbation to get used to the way they feel and work out what suits him best. 'Get him to put one on in private (or in front of you, if you’re in the mood for a show) and have a wank,' Topher suggests. 'Standing up is an excellent position to start in: his cock will hang down and blood will rush to the tip, helping the ring to work quickly and effectively.'

Now, go forth, and become lord of the rings!

Like this? Then you may also be interested in:

Your Top Sex Questions Answered: No Bullshit

All The Questions You've Ever Wanted To Ask A Sex Therapist: Answered 

Everything You Always Wanted To Know About Anal Sex But Were Too Afraid To Ass...Erm, Ask

Follow Alix Fox on Twitter @AlixFox  

Tags: Sex, Sex O\'Clock