Alix Fox | Contributing Writer | Tuesday, 10 February 2015

A Beginner's Guide To Deep Throat

The Debrief: …with tips from a real-life circus sword swallower. Because who better to teach you to gobble down a pork cutlass without gagging?!

In a hideously stereotypical, sexist List of Deep Things In Order Of Male Preference, ‘deep and meaningful conversations’ and ‘deep cleaning’ would lay, loathed, at the bottom, while towering at the top, allegedly adored by all men, would be ‘deep fried foods’, ‘deep pan pizza’… and ‘deep throating’. 

What is deep throat? 

‘Deep throating’ is a full-on form of oral sex, in which a bloke’s erect penis is taken all the way to the back of the mouth, so it enters the throat, and may even be momentarily partially swallowed. If the person doing the deep throating is unable to override their natural gag reflex (which is purposefully designed to stop objects entering the throat, and thus prevent choking), then coughing, spluttering or – bletch - vomiting may occur as their partner’s wang whacks against their tonsils. 

Yet despite the risk that it may cause a gal to blow chunks during a blow job, deep throating is supposedly the holy grail of head-giving. According to received wisdom, guys find that being deep throated turns them on like Blackpool illuminations. But is that really true, or is it yet another myth perpetuated by porn? 

Do guys actually like deep throat? 

‘I’ve heard mates say that it feels amazing when a girl’s throat is squeezing and pulsing around their dick, but to be honest, I think the thrill of being deep-throated is more psychological than physical,’ says Bryan, 25.

‘It’s a power thing – like, “Oh yeah, take my whole cock”. And if a lass coughs a bit, it makes me feel good about the size of my junk; it’s flattering that it’s hard for her to manage the total length of me. Although only a douchebag would get off on making his girlfriend genuinely suffer. In fact, I suspect my ex used to pretend she was struggling to handle my girth more than she actually was, to give me an ego boost!’ 

Read More: Your Need To Know On Ben Wah Balls

Mark, 27, agrees that the buzz he gets from a deep-throat BJ is ‘more about lovig the fact that my partner is willing to do something so extreme and obscene, and watching her push herself to her limits for me, rather than the physical sensations involved actually being that mind-blowing – although the visual is ridiculously sexy, too.’ 

I spoke to one man – Ben, 28 – who reported that deep-throating was actually uncomfortable for him. ‘I don’t like being crammed, jammed and bent into someone’s mouth,’ he said.

Another guy said the sight of ‘a girl retching, with mascara streaming down her face as her eyes water just seems utterly horrible.’

Science says that the most sensitive, nerve-ending-rich areas of a man’s meat are around the head, so you can give a hella-good hummer just by concentrating your efforts at the top end of his todger. However, it does seem like there’s a good case for giving deep-throating a try, if you’re so inclined – not least because some women find it hyper-hot themselves.

Do women enjoy giving deep throat? 

‘I get such a kick out of being able to show off how deep I can take a cock – it’s a point of pride, and massively empowering to know I have the entirety of his most important organ in my mouth,’ says Penny, 23.  

Alex, 31, says she has to stay so calm and concentrate so much in order to deep-throat her boyfriend’s total length, bit by bit, that she finds it an almost meditative experience. Deep throating for deep relaxation – who’da thunk it?! Buddjism, anyone? 

Deep throating certainly isn’t everyone’s cuppa, whether male or female, but if you do want to give it a whirl, read our top tips before you dive in at the deep end, and avoid an epic fail-latio…

How do you deep throat someone? 

• Test out your gag reflex and get used to the sensation of deep throating before attempting it IRL by experimenting with a banana or dildo in private. Yup, you’ll feel like a numpty – but that’s infinitely less embarrassing than accidentally regurgitating all over his gonads.

Some people also ‘train’ themselves daily to control their gag reflex by purposefully tickling the back of their throat with their toothbrush every time they clean their gnashers.

• ‘Deep throating is an intense and intimate act, which you should only attempt with partners you trust 100%,’ advises Renee, manager of Sh! sex store. Because actually choking is about as far from fun as Nick Griffin is from being a DILF, whoever you’re playing with needs to be careful not to get carried away, however awesome your oral may feel – ‘stop’ means ‘right fucking now’, and especially if you’re a beginner, your partner needs to let you control the pace and depth.

‘Halting the action by saying a safe word can be tricky when you have your mouth full, so agree on a signal like tapping him twice on the thigh to let him know you need a break,’ Renee suggests wisely.

• I figured that someone who swallows actual swords for a living would be a great person to ask about swallowing pork swords. Hannibal Helmurto is a sword swallower and extreme stunt performer with The Circus of Horrors, who can not only swallow multiple blades at once, but is also able to slide a light-up neon tube down his gullet.

‘The trick is to try to create a perfect straight line from your mouth all the way down your throat, so that any… ahem, “implement” you’re trying to slip in there has an unimpeded passageway into the pharynx,’ he says.

What's the best position for deep throat? 

A good position to encourage this is to lay flat on your back, with your head hanging over the edge of your bed. Have your partner stand or kneel on the floor with their penis at your mouth level – as though you’re about to 69, except instead of leaning forward to pleasure you, he stays upright. 

• ‘Consider propping up a mirror nearby, so he can enjoy watching what’s going on without moving around too much,’ suggests Renee. 

• Go s-l-o-w-l-y. Slowly enough to make a sloth on ketamine look like Linford Christie. You can bruise or damage the back of your throat by slamming and ramming his wang in your gob like it’s a crash test dummy. Make your motions smooth and fluid. He’ll need to stay largely still while you gradually take him in, little by little.  

How do you breathe when you're doing deep throat? 

• Breathe through your nose, and try exhaling as you guide him back into your mouth. 

• ‘I find that if I press my thumb into the palm of my hand while I’m deep-throating, it stops me feeling sick,’ says Rhiannon, 26. ‘No idea how it works – something to do with acupressure? – but it does for me.’

• These ‘Good Head Suckers’ lollipops have a name worse than a pair of twins called Ben and Neil Down, but they’re actually pretty effective if you’re into that kinda thing: the numbing version helps desensitise the back of your throat a little, so you’re not on such a hurling hair-trigger. 

• Finally, do get your gent to warn you before he’s about to climax. As Jackie, 32, puts it: ‘If he shoots his load right at the back of your throat, you can end up with a sinus full o’ semen. I could smell spunk for three days.’ 

Like this? Then you might also be interested in:

NSFW: A Beginner’s Guide To Double Penetration  

Here Are A Few Playground Sex Myths That Are Actually True

What The Weird Stuff You Say During Sex Really Means

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Tags: Sex, NSFW, Sex O\'Clock