Alyss Bowen | Social Media Editor | Friday, 15 April 2016

Plastic Surgeon Has Managed To Categorise Every Single Female Butt On The Planet Into These 5 Shapes

Plastic Surgeon Has Managed To Categorise Every Single Female Butt On The Planet Into These 5 Shapes

The Debrief: What a guy...

It’s happened again, our bodies are being segregated into stereotypical shapes and sizes. Remember when a study showed our boobs fell into 7 different shapes and sizes? Yeh, like that but this time it’s all to do with our butts. 

Dr Matthew Schulman, a plastic surgeon from New York has devised a ‘definitive’ guide to the 5 bum shapes women fall into. Schulman told Cosmopolitan that over the course of his career, he’s examined around about 50, 000 butts from 35 countries. Apparently that makes him a bum genius with the abilities to place all us females into one of five butt boxes and that's that. Yeh, we're not having it. We are all different, it's time to leave our butts alone!! 

If you fancy actually seeing what bum shape you are – because let's face it, we're probably all a bit curious – here you go...

1. Square

And you should be wearing boy shorts according to Dr S. Listen, we haven't worn boy shorts since Tammy Girl went into liquidation, enough. 

2. V-Shape

Something to do with your pelvis and hip angle going inward?! Who knows if their pelvis and hip angle goes inward?? I don't even know where that angle is. 

3. A-shaped

Dr Schulman says those A-shaped bums accommodate fuller tights – erm excuse me, but those 'fuller tights' have been werking it in the gym and are the sign of a strong, independant lady. Just no. 

4. The upside-down heart

Have we gone into emoji territory now? We we calling our butts cute names to make them seem sweeter?! I have no clue about this one, at all. 

5. Round

Apparently if this is your ass shape you should stick to knickers that give the butt area more coverage. Well, we're off to Primark to buy the smallest underwear we can find because we can wear whatever the hell we want for our behinds that come in a variety of shapes and sizes. Ta-ta, Dr S. 

Like this? You might also be interested in…

Which One Of These 7 Boob Types Do You Have 

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Follow Alyss on Twitter @alyssbowen 

Tags: Body worries