Gemma Styles | Contributing writer | Saturday, 26 September 2015

Gemma Styles: Is Our Love Affair With iPhones Coming To An End?

Gemma Styles: Is Our Love Affair With iPhones Coming To An End?

The Debrief: Remember back in 2012 when Apple changed the charger shape for the iPhone 5 and everyone went mental? Looks like they might have new plans to MESS WITH OUR HEADS

Photographed by Matilda Hill-Jenkins

What’s it gonna take, eh? Is there anything that will make us give up our love affair with the iPhone? For those of you who have already decided they’re not buying into the hype, eschewing the Apple giant in favour of Android devices or, shock horror, a lesser known smartphone – I can see you through your screens scoffing at me. Guffaw away friends, this sheep is happy with her hardware.

Hoooowever. That’s not to say there aren’t times when things in Apple land don’t get a bit ruddy annoying. I’m all for giving way to progress but they do have an occasional tendency to basically ruin all your stuff – by making it obsolete.

Remember the glory days of 2012 when the iPhone 5 launched? There was chaos and uproar, there was fighting in the streets (maybe), when people realised not only that they’d need new chargers, but all their fancy little gadgets wouldn’t work anymore either.

The amassed wealth of speakers, docking stations were rendered obsolete in one fail swoop. Then there was always the option to purchase undoubtedly pricey adapters to hang onto your stuff but… eventually we all bowed and got new speakers for Christmas. 

‘Has anyone got an iPhone charger?’ quickly turned into ‘Anyone got a four/five charger?’ as we adapted to the cruel and unusual transition period. Thankfully, we’re pretty much past that now – there’s nothing more galling than finding a charger for your dead phone, only to discover it’s the wrong one. When my phone died one night this week I was bereft. I resorted to actually reading a newspaper on the bus and ripping out pieces of pages for things I wanted to Google. The inhumanity.

Which is why the release of the iPhone 6S the other week was comforting in a way. The biggest change on the surface of things is that you can get a pink one. And who can be annoyed about that?! (My friend has pre-ordered one and I’m irrationally jealous. I already have a pink case on mine. But NEW THINGS.) So, as JK Rowling would say: all was well (10 points to Gryffindor if you can name that reference.)

But for how long can this last? Rumour has it, there are big changes to come with the anticipated arrival of the iPhone 7 and beyond… and it’s about more than just chargers people. 

Not content with confusing everyone by shaking up their software, word on the grapevine is that Apple is also looking into changing the headphone jack on your future iPhone… In the constant quest to make phones thinner and lighter (although apparently not smaller, wtf @you, iPhone 6+) Apple has reportedly patented a new technology for connecting headphones that means your current headphones/car connections/anything that you use an aux cable for will be worth diddly squat to you when you inevitably run out of storage and have to upgrade.

So – is this going to be it? The final straw that breaks the camel’s proverbial back? Realistically, probably not. As pissed as we’ll be, as we queue up to buy our bespoke Apple headphones that don’t actually work with any other device we own, we have a weird emotional attachments to our iPhones that no other smartphone brand has managed to replicate.

Maybe it’s the technology equivalent of an abusive relationship – they keep changing the rules, we keep coming back for more. But does that mean I’m going to ditch my beloved iPhone any time soon? Of course not. 

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Follow Gemma on Twitter @GemmaAnneStyles

Photographed by Matilda Hill-Jenkins

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