Jess Commons | Deputy Editor | Wednesday, 4 February 2015

The Magic Mike XXL Trailer Is Here, We Use It As An Excuse To Recall Channing Tatum's Overly-Sexualised Version Of The Worm

The Debrief: Best human being ever? Or best human being ever?

Good news people of the earth with eyeballs in their head; Magic Mike XXL is incoming. Yesterday, Channing Tatum, him of the excellent comedic wit and the dance moves that put even ’90s Britney to shame, Tweeted this picture announcing the film’s release date. Don’t get too excited, though – it’s not, as the poster seems to suggest, in four days, it’s just that stupid American way of doing dates and really they mean the first of July. Pesky Americans.

Up until the first Magic Mike film, skinny little hipster boys, slight of frame, with something ‘interesting’ to say and a pair of rounded spectacles perched on their nose were my ‘type’. Big rugby player-esque chaps were reseved for posh girls and the contestants of Take Me Out. THEN came Channing Tatum dancing to Ginuwine’s Pony and all of a sudden I realised what the middle-aged women at that Take That comeback gigs were screaming about. 

In case you’ve never seen Magic Mike, and let’s make it clear, it’s highly important that you do, here’s a super-quick breakdown of some of the finest moments. You can watch the whole video here if you are in a safe viewing place/in the right place in your life to behold such glory.

First, Channing does this:

Channing Tatum Pony on Make A Gif

Then he does this: 

5ECyfJ on Make A Gif, Animated Gifs

And then he does this: 

KbJeUX on Make A Gif, Animated Gifs 

Doing an overly-sexualised version of The Worm is only the tip of Channing’s talents though. Let’s take a minute to remember the greatest gift the Sony hacks gave us: a look at the email he wrote when he found out 22 Jump Street had a better opening weekend than Ted:

F YOU TED !!!! SECOND OF ALLLL TIMMMMME BEEEOTCH!!!! COME ON JUMPSTREETERS WE GOT CATE BLANCHETT WIT DIS BOX OFFICE BITCHES!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA
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Yep, he typed all of that. Every last ‘HA’. Also, a whole bunch more ‘HAs’ it just seemed gratuitous to include. Also an important offering from Channing: this dance-off he held with his equally cool wife Jenna Dewan-Tatum at last year’s Golden Globes. Apparently dance-offs are a regular thing in the Dewan-Tatum household. Channing told Redbook, ‘Dance battles do sort of happen, to be honest. When we wake up in the morning, we put on music, and while [daughter] Everly’s eating, we dance and it just starts to get stupid.’

 

A video posted by Marie Claire (@marieclairemag) on Jan 12, 2015 at 1:10am PST

Obviously, he’s also just been in Foxcatcher and was totally amazing AND had bleached blonde tips and managed to make them look good. 

Here ends the ode to Channing Tatum. Stupid name, excellent human being.

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Tags: Film