Emma Watson has been cast as Belle in Disney’s reboot of the 1991 cartoon Beauty and the Beast. She announced it on
: ‘I'm finally able to tell you... that I will be playing Belle in Disney's new live-action Beauty and the Beast!’
‘It was such a big part of my growing up, it almost feels surreal that I’ll get to dance to Be Our Guest and sing Something There. My six year old self is on the ceiling – heart bursting. Time to start some singing lessons. I can’t wait for you to see it. Emma xx.’
And the post – which has been liked over a million times – has got us to thinking. Firstly – how will they update the story to compete with modern films like Brave and Frozen, which put the men fighting over the woman on the backburner while the real fun happens. Secondly, who’s going to play who in the film?
Beast
Tom Hardy would be the right hulking angry sort for this role, but then again, he’s a little bit too old to be leching after young Belle, plus, we think Shia LaBeouf could do Beast’s aggression to a similar standard. The downside? We just might not get those tender moments of vulnerability that are key to the Beast. If Adam Driver from Girls is good enough for a Star Wars movie, he could be good enough for this. But, it’s worth considering that, when the Beast transforms into his human form, he looks a lot like Jamie Campbell Bower. Whoever the producers cast in this role will be some hint as to how the story plays out.
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Gaston
He might be a proper serious actor now, but Channing Tatum has exactly the sort of neck needed to play a macho small-town thug like Gaston.
Gaston’s little friend
Jonah Hill – he cornered the market for playing the oafish side-kick way back with The Wolf Of Wall Street, right?
Lumière
Andrew Garfield has the exact same face-shape and spindliness as Lumière, but we think that Bill Nighy could also do a good job. If we want to go with someone that looks a bit French, Adrien Brody’s got enough lank for the role, and after his part in The Grand Budapest Hotel, we know he’s not too serious for a Disney film.
Chip
A young Freddie Highmore would have been perfect, but he’s a little bit too old now, so how’s about Bertie Gilbert, who’s 17, and played Scorpius Malfoy in Harry Potter?
Mrs Potts
Helen Mirren would be great, as would Julie Walters, but Miriam Margoyles might have just the right warmth needed for the role. If we’re looking for an American actress, Jane Fonda could do a good job, too.
Wardrobe
For this, we need a statuesque and wise woman, maybe one who can put in some slapstick. Miranda Hart could work, but if we’re going Stateside for an actress, Kristen Johnston (you know, from 3rd Rock From The Sun, way back when) has the right comic timing for the job.
Cogsworth
Timothy Spall. No questions – he looks EXACTLY like the officious clock
And as for Belle’s dad? If we’re staying French, Gérard Depardieu would work, but American-wise, if we want a bit of lols, Bill Murray would be a sure hit.
Casting directors? Take notice.
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This article originally appeared on The Debrief.